Check Out Lindsay Lohan's New Future Pad!

Jul 14th, 2010

Welcome to your humble abode, Lindsay Lohan! During her 90 day (which will probably be reduced to 23 days) stay, Lohan will have all of these lovely amenities in her jail cell. And just to get her excited, some newly released prisoners have spilled the beans on what a happy stay she'll have.

Newly released prisoners [from the Century Regional Detention Facility where Lohan is expected to serve her sentence] predicted Lohan will be crawling the walls in no time.

"She's going to come out of here talking to herself," said Daniella Aguilar. "I had someone in my cell to talk to, and I was going crazy."

Jasmine Waters, who served three months, warned Lohan about the "slop." "The food is horrible," said Waters, 20. "The worst is the teriyaki. We call it teri-yucky."

The inmates have nicknames for the other entrees. The baloney sandwiches are "mystery meat." The processed chicken patties are "erasers." And the peculiar house specialty - ground beef and potatoes on toast - is referred to with little affection as "shit on a shingle."

Every morning the PA system wakes the ladies at 5 a.m. sharp. Inmates are let out of their cells for just an hour a day and there is commissary where they can buy candy and shampoo. Make-up is banned and most wear dark blue uniforms. Even their bras and underwear are prison-issue and have seen better days.

Can't say I'm jealous.

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